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What the best Christmas Gift for wife..


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I told my girl I was going to buy her one of those "Shake weights" when we saw them at Wally World. She didn't think it was funny until I found the commercial on YouTube and showed her how they're used. :lolol:

 

Part of the real commercial:

 

 

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SNL's take on it:

 

 

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Here are ideas that I have found to be successful without resorting to diamonds and really expensive crap that high-maintenance chicks tend to expect (like cars and Italian handbags that say "LV" that cost more than I make in a year - Plus you will inevitably choose the wrong color or style on those items):

 

Spa Gift Certificate - Pampering and the only place she can get a facial that won't bother you

Personalized Compact Mirror or Jewelry Box - Inscribed, "To _____ Merry Christmas 2010 Love _____" The mall usually has a place that does this, but a trophy type shop should have no problem either.

 

Necklace with Picture Locket - Women love Jewelry and you can put in a picture that has personal meaning (a pet, relative, you - but remember a picture of your junk may not go over well as women don't think the Batwing or Wristwatch is as funny as we do)

Large Framed Wedding Pictures/Important Moments Pictures - Make sure it isn't a picture of her while conceiving or having your first child. She wants pictures that make her look good and a white wedding dress is perfect... or a picture of you on vacation or her doing her favorite hobby with you (not shopping or knitting, but horseback riding, skiing, surfing, hiking, etc. - the active hobbies). You can go to Wal Mart and scan old pictures and fix them up for printing bigger ones.

 

If she is a real bacon fan, there is an expensive candy bar at Whole Foods that has bacon and smoked salt in dark or normal chocolate. I hope this helps!

Edited by BuffetDestroyer
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http://www.kegelmaster2000.com/

 

The gift that truely keeps on giving!! :lolol:

 

literally been planning on gettin one of these, funds just havent allowed for a $100 pussy workout tool. Not that it is needed but the tighter the better in my book!!

 

 

ETA if your afraid of gettin your ass kicked for givin her one of those i suggest one of these http://www.personalizationmall.com/Personalized-Ladies-Bikini-Thongs-Property-Of-Design-p8246.prod?sdest=dept&sdestid=1421&storeid=19&categoryid=1421

 

 

Or a set of these http://www.personalizationmall.com/Personalized-Camisole-Underwear-Set-Fuschsia-My-Girl-Design-p10780.prod?sdest=dept&sdestid=1421&storeid=19&categoryid=1421

 

 

There expesive as hell, i think a paid $50-60 bucks after shipping for the tank top and panties but my girl loves em. also get the thongs that say "property of ____" and make that bitch wear em everyday!!!!:lolol:

Edited by big-J
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literally been planning on gettin one of these, funds just havent allowed for a $100 pussy workout tool. Not that it is needed but the tighter the better in my book!!

 

So what you're saying is.................your dick is too small, and that she needs to tighten up her vag to conform to your little penis? :unsure:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I keeeeeed, I keeeeeed!!! :lolol:

 

Just messin' with ya.

 

 

 

Or a set of these http://www.personalizationmall.com/Personalized-Camisole-Underwear-Set-Fuschsia-My-Girl-Design-p10780.prod?sdest=dept&sdestid=1421&storeid=19&categoryid=1421

 

 

There expesive as hell, i think a paid $50-60 bucks after shipping for the tank top and panties but my girl loves em. also get the thongs that say "property of ____" and make that bitch wear em everyday!!!!:lolol:

 

What about just buying a cheap wife-beater and taking a Sharpie marker to it? :lol:

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Or a set of these http://www.personalizationmall.com/Personalized-Camisole-Underwear-Set-Fuschsia-My-Girl-Design-p10780.prod?sdest=dept&sdestid=1421&storeid=19&categoryid=1421

 

 

There expesive as hell, i think a paid $50-60 bucks after shipping for the tank top and panties but my girl loves em. also get the thongs that say "property of ____" and make that bitch wear em everyday!!!!:lolol:

 

What about just buying a cheap wife-beater and taking a Sharpie marker to it? :lol:

 

Lemme know how that one works out for ya...I'll wait for ya to come back down outta orbit from the bitch slap.

 

Best gift? Pretty sure she'd be proposing to me if I got her a 1911...

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Or a set of these http://www.personalizationmall.com/Personalized-Camisole-Underwear-Set-Fuschsia-My-Girl-Design-p10780.prod?sdest=dept&sdestid=1421&storeid=19&categoryid=1421

 

 

There expesive as hell, i think a paid $50-60 bucks after shipping for the tank top and panties but my girl loves em. also get the thongs that say "property of ____" and make that bitch wear em everyday!!!!:lolol:

 

What about just buying a cheap wife-beater and taking a Sharpie marker to it? :lol:

 

Lemme know how that one works out for ya...I'll wait for ya to come back down outta orbit from the bitch slap.

 

Best gift? Pretty sure she'd be proposing to me if I got her a 1911...

 

She wouldn't slap me.......she'd surely stab me in face, though. :lol:

 

On the 1911 bit....I wish my girl was into guns. I'd love to buy her one, I even told her I'll buy her whatever gun she wants. But alas, some people are just not into it, other than her going to the range just to make me happy. :cryss:

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