If you're a legitimate business, it's YOUR responsibility to ensure that (a) your contact information (e-mail addresses, phone numbers, mailing addresses, etc.) is up-to-date, (

your customer service is first-rate; what ever happened to "the customer is always right!"?, and © your catalog and website are accurate and up-to-date. It is NOT your customers' responsibility to take care of any issues that ensue because you haven't performed your job well as a business owner. And it is absolutely NEVER okay to berate your customers for your mistakes.
AH, you did everything you could to resolve the situation amicably - and to give them a chance to do the RIGHT thing. Your credit card company even gave them the benefit of the doubt, but once it became apparent that they had no viable, current contact, your credit card company did the right thing in reversing the charges, because by all appearances, it seemed that you had been scammed and ripped off.
For them to then call you a thief and a liar, for not returning something which they wouldn't tell you where to send it, is unconscionable and unacceptable.
Thanks for the heads-up. This company should go on a "black list" of bad people to deal with. I know that *I* won't be sending them any of my hard-earned dollars.
I don't do customer service where I work. I run the warehouse, and I handle shipping and receiving. I do a lot of international orders, and I deal with people for whom English isn't always easy. I've learned that you MUST be polite, clear, and straightforward in your dealings, whether it be with customers or freight carriers. Like I said, I don't do customer service, but it was I who came up with our one clear customer service policy guideline: When a customer contacts us with a complaint or a problem, our FIRST RESPONSE to them is, "What can we do to fix it?" We don't argue, we don't accuse, we don't cajole - we treat the customer as if they are correct and we've made a mistake. I ship out a couple million dollars worth of stuff every year, and it's rare that I screw up, but I DO SCREW UP. It's not my place to belittle the customer for catching my mistake, or to try to put it on them.
One customer with a great experience might tell 5 friends; one customer with a horrible experience will tell everyone who will listen. That's why you have to make damned sure that even the worst customers have a good experience.
Again, thanks for the heads-up.
Mike