really appreciate any advise guys

I started off buying something small, been happily married for almost 10 years. Still haven't upgraded the ring and she doesn't seem to mind.

-E

Get her one of these:

Algordanza

You'll have to get the ashes of a dead body, but that would be one hell of a story to tell the grand kids.

WOW, that is terribly horrific, but interesting, lol

lol i voted for "other" buy from me....got one but the b!tch wound up cheating on me....dirty whore....if ur serious i got all the details...


fyi...neither of the chics in my avatar.

yea i been there with my last engagement unfortunately....but i won't be looking to run out and buy right away, least not for a year unless i win the lottery or get a higher paying job (which may been soon ) but that really sucks man, what kinda ring is it?

1 ct round solitaire, colorless (E), i think its an (I) for clarity...but w/ its colorless, it looks pretty damn clear to me....plat band.

Any other pic's of the girls in your photo?? to share

sure...i got paypal.....

I used the mentality in my recent ring purchase that I use when I buy my weapons.

Buy once and buy the best you can afford.....if she is truely the one.

Engagement Ring

Wedding Band

My girl loves her rings, and this is really the only bling-bling she wears. She is not a gold digger as she knows I'm an active duty Marine....she knows it's not a get rich career. But, I feel that she is worth being able to show off her rings as much as I get to show off her so it's a win, win situation.

Good luck with your future endeavors.

Buy new and don't scrimp.... unless it is a "Family hand me down" that means something.....
IMO pawn shop rings carry a stigma of a bad relationship...... not that I'm superstitious or anything....
Just that new says you're worth it vs. look at the killer deal I got on this used ring...........

Buy the diamond and mount seperately. Bought the diamond from Blue Nile. Do your homework and you can get a great diamond with the specs you want at a great price from there. When I took the diamond to get looked at by the jewler, he asked where I got it at. Told him off the internet and the price and his jaw hit the floor. Said it was a great deal.

But once again, make sure to do your homework first on diamonds. Clarity, cut, color. and Carat weight.

Cool then...wanna buy some?

Get her the absolute best diamond and ring that you can possibly afford w/o debt. You are establishing her value to you and you will continue to do so all your married life. There are many versions of the story of Johnny Lingo and his 8 cow wife but the following will establish my point. Always buy her the very best that you can and treat her as if she were the most precious of all your posessions. You will reap a lifetime of happiness and all the guns or hobbies that you want. Wisdom from one who knows. Just for fun here is a picture of the proof of my theory after 27 years of marriage.
Click to view attachment

1911

Eight-Cow Wife: Johnny Lingo lived in the South Pacific. The islanders all spoke highly of this man, but when it came time for him to find a wife the people shook their heads in disbelief. In order to obtain a wife you paid for her by giving her father cows. Four to six cows was considered a high price. But the woman Johnny Lingo chose was plain, skinny and walked with her shoulders hunchedand her head down. She was very hesitant and shy. What surprised everyone was Johnny's offer -- he gave eight cows for her! Everyone chuckled about it, since they believed his father-in-law put one over on him.

Several months after the wedding, a visitor from the U.S. came to the islands to trade and heard the story about Johnny Lingo and his eight-cow wife. Upon meeting Johnny and his wife the visitor was totally taken back, since this wasn't a shy, plain and hesitant woman but one who was beautiful, poised and confident. The visitor asked about the transformation, and Johnny Lingo's response was very simple. "I wanted an eight-cow woman, and when I paid that for her and treated her in that fashion, she began to believe that she was an eight-cow woman. She discovered she was worth more than any other woman in the islands. And what matters most is what a woman thinks about herself."

Nothing says " I love you" like a 308 Saiga.

You will be amazed at the sale prices that a store like JC Penny's has!
A lot of their stuff is junk, but if you look carefully and educate yourself, there are some great deals to be had during their sales.

Is she a virgin or have you guys already been down the road of carnality?I would say a nice long engagement is in order if you aren't religious and just rushing into it because you want to mate with her.I courted the woman I am married to for 4 years just so we got the kinks worked out and we each knew what to expect.We just celebrated our 10th anniversary and got all of the problems that cause most people to get divorced out of the way beforehand.I have know this woman and wanted her since 1994 but she thought I was "charming but sleazy" and wouldn't "give it up" out of wedlock and I wasn't about to try and con a girl like that lest God strike me dead,lol

Women these days are fickle,easily offended and twice as likely to cheat when their feelers get hurt as a man so get ready for some serious turbulence if you don't have a kethubah(marriage contract) and a partner who is committed to an authority other than her "feelings".

I refer to my wife as "the woman who will throw the dirt over my grave" as I am committed until death and she refers to me as "The one and only sire of her offspring".It may sound funny but some of the things that we committed to have really gone a long way towards making our marriage solid.

1.Have some modesty,never go to the toilet in front of your spouse

2.Never argue with females,condescend and sit them on your lap telling them "it's ok baby" then do what you want anyway if they haven't talked some sense into you by then,lol

3.Pick your battles:Let them make 80% of the decisions that no man really cares about but make them think it's because you are deferring to their expertise."Gee honey,you'd know more about that than I would,you decide" Example:I may have purple couch and a house that smells like potpourri but I live a considerable distance from my mother in law who grates my every nerve.She can decide all of the superfluous details but I make the big decisions and she rarely question my decisions.

4.Do nice things for your wife at least 3 times per week whether you feel like it or not.I mean force yourself to cook,give her massages,etc.Even if she's being cranky that will go a long way towards making her appreciate you and snapping out of it.

5.Pause and look her up and down every time she gets dressed and puts on makeup and say what you would if you wanted to "get some"I MEAN EVERY SINGLE DAY.My wife gets ready to go to the office and I look her up and down and say "Oooooh baby look at that sexy girl,you look good enough to eat baby"Doing this on a daily basis will firmly fix in her mind that she is desired and important and even if you aren't in the mood to be nice doing so will guarantee that she will accommodate your every whim when opportunity arises(if you know what I mean)

I never bought my wife an engagement ring but she tells her friends that I treat her like a queen and that makes me the king right? ;)All of our friends have gotten married and divorced in the time we have been married and we noticed that the majority of the reasons were easily avoided and all of them went to moon with engagement rings,new houses,exotic honeymoons but because they didn't have any idea of how to manage their day to day relationship they ended up divorced in 5-7 years.

If she really loves you she'll say yes quickly and marry you without the engagement ring!

1911 -- I believe you experienced a moment of "seniortiss" by posting that photo of your beautiful missus.

Like, take another hard look my-man!


She's NOT wearing a wedding or engagement or any other sort of band or ring, on any finger of her left hand!!!!!!!!


..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ...............

Gary we don't always put on our jewelry first thing on a Saturday morning after 27 years. Personally I think she looks hot with or without it.

1911 -- I completely understand and couldn't agree with you more.

I just found it funnier and ironic as heck.... that here we are sharing opinions regarding engagement rings, etc.... and you stated all that you did... while posting a photo of your wife, sans wedding band or engagement ring.


You gotta admit.... that's pretty dog-gone funny!!!!

The 27th of this month makes 30 years for me all I can ask is why, why in god’s name do you want to get married are you tired of having fun, just kidding it has been the best ride ever get her the very best you can and if she is the right one she will know you did your best.

Yep, that qualifies as a faux paux (fux pas for those of you in never mind).

My sentiments exactly,
By the biggest rock you can afford, buy a new one, and get platinum for the Band, It last longer and takes wear better.
Put it on layaway or credit or something.

Word of experience: such a ring is legally considered a 'gift' and should the relationship go sour as half do in this country, kiss that $$$ goodbye forever, even if it's considered a family heirloom (unless you have a prenup agreement.) Take it from one who knows.

Guns, and a cubic zirconia, brilliant cut. If she has it appraised, then she's a gold digger and you're better off without her anyhow! About 1/2 to 3/4 carat should do it. Have it put in a really nice setting.

Your fiance already knows, right? So let her have a hand in picking the ring. The two of you go out together and look. Pay very close attention to what she likes. She doesn't have to be there when you buy it, get it by yourself and then give it to her when she's not expecting it. DO NOT get a used ring unless it's a family heirloom. Even if it was only purchased for a relationship that went sour, and was never given, the intent was there, and went sour. It's still bad luck.

My wife picked her engagement ring, and was very happy with it. Actually, she's not real fond of diamonds, and didn't pick one. She told me that everyone had diamonds, so they couldn't be that special.

As a machinist, I'm not supposed to even wear any rings, and studying to be a nurse, she wasn't either. For our 15th anniversary, on the anniversary date, we got a tattoo ring on each of our ring fingers, and don't wear the bands anymore.

Ok this is not where I bought my woman's ring from, but they do have pictures of it.

Le Vian Pink Saphire & Diamonds.

Luckily for me she's a rockhound too. She knows diamonds are not rare and that the supply & price are controlled. Plus she likes colored stones far more anyway.
Gota love a woman who don't buy into fertilizer that De Beers is spreading.

Hello
Don't waste a bunch of money on a diamond. I mean, yeah, it's an engagement/ wedding ring, so it needs a diamond, but I would spend the $$$ on a unique (read: "custom made") setting that she would really appreciate, with a small but tasteful diamond and maybe even another precious or semi-precious stone setting as well.
Diamonds are a total rip. Yeah, ya gotta do a diamond, but don't be a sucker and be pulled into that bullshit and spend a fortune on one.
Really, they all pretty much look alike, once they're mounted and you're looking at 'em from a few feet away. A really nice, artful setting stands out a lot more, and says a lot more than a diamond that looks like all the other millions of diamonds could ever say.

For instance, I'm a woodworker, so my wife got me a beautiful custom wedding band made with big Oak trees running around it. Her band has Oak leaves intertwined around it, with a few small, tasteful diamonds sprinkled around. I think they're beautiful, and we get people mentioning how unique they are fairly regularly.
Probably cost a lot less than a big honkin' rock would have, but they mean a lot more to both of us.

Hope this helps....

guido2 in Houston

Go to a jewelry store with her, make a day of it. Don't do this right before you buy it, that's too obvious Notice what she likes and take mental notes (whippin out a pad and paper in the store just doesn't seem right to me ). Once you got her style down you can either go out yourself if your comfortable/good at buying jewelry or take the weasel way out and get her to come along.

Either way, you put effort into it, not just $. That being said...spend some dough.

+1 to Tritium, if it all goes south don't ask for it back (and be a stubborn ass and don't take it back, you'll cry if you try to sell it back)

Great idea on the custom setting Guido!

I appreciate all the advise guys, and to answer your questions SOPMOD, lol, i'm not rushing into it for a quickie in the sheets, we already been down that road and we have been friends for a couple of years before we started dating and we been together for nearly 2 years now, my plan is to start saving i suppose and either have a descent down payment or have enough for the full purchase price. We have never had a fight, but we do have a occaisonal disagreement, i know how to handle myself pretty well with women b/c of all the mistakes i've made with the last engagement/near marriage (4 years), i'm sure she'll say yes but i'm pondering if i could go another route with this? Maybe instead of a ring all together just save it all for a down payment for a home? i dunno, i'd have to discuss this with her but i'd really like to keep it a surprise. But for a ring, so far i know it better be princess cut, and it better be a platinum band that isn't "cookie cutter crap" so i guess i got time for a search, hopefully i can do this without jumping over the counter with pushy sales women at the jewelry stores, but i will look into places like blue nile and ect. Once again thanks for the ideas

Thanks, Will.

guido2

I was fortunate enough that my dad had a long time friend who owned Lordo's Diamonds. I let my wife pick the setting she liked, then I went through the bags of stones until we had the size and quality that made it Bling . A good Jeweler can always adjust the setting to mount the stones you choose, and as said before, buy quality, buy once. Well sometimes twice as my then young bride was digging in the yard with her rings on, and after much searching and a few gallons of round up the center stone was never found -thank god for home owners insurance .
You can't buy love, but you can sure make um happy when they get a wedding set they're proud of. My wife of 19 years isn't much for jewelery, but she sure loves that ring even after all these years and she knows I went the extra mile to get the one she liked back in the early days when I didn't have a lot to start with. Just make sure you pick the bride as carefully as the ring and always remember , you get out of it, what you put in to it...........best advice I have for a good marriage.

In short-Diamond broker/jeweler. Connection if possible. (also never hurts if they're old Italian connections )

I have a connection but its half way around the world, so spending 1800-2000 bucks for a plane ticket would defeat the savings, but i'll attempt my best with what i got here....

She probably wants some say in what it is, no matter how much of a surprise it ends up being. So next time you're in the mall together go by a store and let her give you some hints. If she has a really wide range of what she might want in mind, maybe a zirconia may be ok, if she's the functional type, but otherwise it's better to go small and get the real thing than get a huge artificial rock.

We went for something that had a good bit of ring to it, not just a rock on stilts with a tiny strip holding it all together. After she got it, all her subsequently engaged friends wished they had it. It's a three-stone ring that's both real and functional, and offers 180 degree support for the stones. Not the hugest rocks, but we were going quality over quantity.

That being said, a real diamond is definitely good enough. Don't let the metrosexual jewelers talk you into a Leo or anything crazy like that. And the 2 months pay thing is exaggerated. Hers was at the top of our price range and it was one month's net pay. Of course if you can't buy most rings in the store for two month's pay, you probably can't afford to get married.

1911

Is that a Thomas Kincade in the background? Not actually a fan but my wife likes his work

As for the rings....

Don't shop on-line! you have to see the stone you are getting. Do not be affraid of inclusions, some are terrible and should be avoided, but some are not really visible form the top where you are going to be looking 99.5% of the time. A good cut can make the inclusion almost vanish. I got my wife a 1.2K round solitare G color I2 and you cannot see the inclusion wihtout a loop (or unless you look form the bottom. It pops real nice

White gold band with 12 more stones totalling .5K

if you can swing it get platinum....white gold is nice but needs periodic dipping in a Rhodium bath to keep it looking white rather that somewhat yellow......unless of course you want yellow gold....which i hate

avoid mall stores.....they suck.

keep in mind, diamond are not rare, they are simply controlled. Negotiate your ass off.....talk em down until they just want you out of the store!

then good luck hiding the thing until the day you want to pop the question......not as easy as you would think!

Yep, it is a T. Kinkade and my bride thinks this is her house to decorate.

This is a little known FACT and you should explore this before you dump big $$$$$. Before WWII almost NOBODY had or bought engagement rings, we are talking 99.999% of the population. When all the GI's returned home all wanting to get married DeBeers jumped on the most incredible marketing myth/ false tradition ever devised. That being: diamonds are rare and worth the expense. This is pure bunk. In addition, they have a monopoly and release only enough diamonds onto the market to simulate their rarity further increasing the price and many/most are mined at the hardships of others. It is a racket and IMHO a ripoff. My wife does not have one and didn't cop a 'tude when she didn't get one. She does have diamond earrings and such but they are modest. She just does not think that way and for that I an thankful. We wear simple pewter bands inscribed with the "Song of Solomon" in yiddish. She is a surgical nurse so she really cannot wear something like that anyway. This should not be veiwed as your commitment or love for anyone. Personally, I wouldn't want someone that shallow. Not extrapolating this to any of you all mind you, but it is YOUR money to do as with you please and your choice. The concept of being cheap does not fly with me either. Why at the beginning of a life long marriage should only you prove yourself by spending cash on something you probably cannot afford while the money could go to something worthwhile like a downpayment on a home, SEP contribution or a mutual fund investment that will really pay off later? As some one mentioned, it is a gift and once given you no longer control it. I have seen women pawn really expensive rings for little to nothing that some guy busted his rear to pay for but since they are no longer together ,well.... you know. Your Grandma's or a handed down ring is a good idea but I have met women that don't want somebody else's or how about the one's that want to have or see the box the ring came in? Make a real investment and good luck and congratulations!

I gave my wife my mothers engagement ring, the wedding band and the engagement ring were modified by a Vietnamese goldsmith back home, the engagement ring and the wedding band lock together.

Since I have already been married once I learned the hard way about buying a monster ring that put me in the hole for years of payments. I promised myself that IF I ever got married again, the woman would get a ring out of a GUMBALL machine and if she really loved me that would be all that she needed.

However my current girlfriend and I are starting to kick the idea around on the ground. And I told her I would not buy a monster ring and she would get one from a gumball machine..........she laughed, then I said I was serious. After a bit of talking SHE actually came up wih the idea of a "man made diamond". You can not tell the difference between the two with the naked eye. It takes a trained person to see it is man made. the killer thing is that you can get a whale of a stone for next to nothing. 2ct with almost perfect clarity and bordering on flawless for about 1500.00 or less. Her friends will thing you robbed a bank for her and be the jealous little bitches that they are and you will both be laughing when you can still afford to purchase a "his and hers" Saiga set!

Avoid the chain jewelers in the mall like the plague. All you will find are overpriced low quality stones. I would also be concerned over sight unseen stones. My suggestion would be:

1. Decide your budget
2. Don't presume to know her taste. It's her finger let her decide, within your budget of course.
3. Shop around a little locally for style and cut (avoid the brilliant aka round cut) I can vouch for emerald cut.
4. Make a trip to New York and visit the diamond district. You will get a much better diamond at a MUCH better price and have 100X the selection. You'll also have a nice trip out of it and something to remember. Also, don't expect a gushing sales person to fall all over there. When my wife and did this there were actually bouncer types outside the stores. They only wanted serious shoppers. When all was said and done I got 3x the diamond I could have gotten locally for the same price.


Arc

no bad mojo on mine...never got to ask my ex...my current wants a square one...and my luck would have it that this one is round... i can cut u a pretty decent deal and its certified.

yea, she's set on a princess cut as well, guess i have a lot of shopping to do and see with what i can come up with, crappy thing for me is that she likes guns AND diamonds and diamond is also her birthstone I doubt she'll expect a monster ring but i'm gonna go after whatever i can afford, and if she doesn't like it, then well, guess it wasn't meant to be, and i'll buy another toy that goes bang

i'm not married, so you can totally disregard anything i say, but i would:

1. look into a prenup for both of your safety. marriage is a contact, and a prenup makes it alot easier if it unfortunately doesn't work out. can save both of you enormous time/legal fees

2. i don't know much about diamonds, but first look at jewelers that say they're diamonds will appraise for more than the cost. then look at other jewelers.

3. if the lady has a soft spot, you could make sure you get her a diamond that wasn't produced by slave labor...some chicks really dig that, others would rather you spend the same $$$ on a bigger slave rock