Ten Good Reasons To Ban Guns

[Eric Pate 478]

I didn't write this, it just got forwarded to me and I thought I'd share. This is stuff we pretty much all know, but its nice to be reminded from time to time.

 

 

"Ten Good Reasons To Ban Guns, A Satire by Bruce Gold

 

1.) Guns are used in self-defense over 2 million times a year. However, this makes the attempted crime a "non-event," which necessarily complicates the Police investigation. Without civilian ownership of guns, these Police investigations would not have been compromised. Civilians should leave crime prevention to the Police, who are properly equipped to investigate following the crime's completion.

 

2.) Some .004 % (4/1000 of 1%) of guns are used in crime each year. This is way too high. All guns should be banned

 

3.) Guns are unnecessary. In 98% of civilian gun defenses, no shot is fired. If you are not going to fire a shot, you clearly don't need a gun. This proves that the guns are unnecessary. Banning guns will prevent these unnecessary defenses.

 

4.) Guns cause criminal migration. In tough gun-law Washington, D. C., violent crime rates are very high. This high crime rate is caused by the migration of criminals from gun havens like Virginia. This migration is caused by the criminal's cowardly avoidance of armed householders and concealed-carry civilians. This criminal migration is detrimental to helpless unarmed citizens in no-gun areas and must be stopped. Guns should be banned everywhere.

 

5.) Most gun crimes are committed by inner city gangs and drug dealers. These relatively small and geographically restricted groups consistently commit the majority of gun crimes, which usually peak as turf wars erupt over Drug War changes. The best way to prevent this is by denying guns to all law abiding people everywhere.

 

6.) No woman needs to protect herself from rape, assault or murder. The Police will protect women by investigating the crime after the fact. Remember, Police paperwork is all the protection anyone really needs.

 

7.) Guns owners are disrespectful of authority. Good citizens should completely rely on the authorities. A failure to do so is an invariable sign of improper and overly independent attitudes. Failure to completely and absolutely trust and depend on the authorities is excessive democracy and sends a bad message to children.

 

8.) Guns owners engaging in self-defense are taking the law into their own hands. This is wrong. Only the Police and Criminals have the right to take the law into their own hands. Guns should be kept out of the hands of law abiding citizens.

 

9.) Children and young people should remain ignorant about guns. Real guns and real gun knowledge dissipate the fantasies created by violent video games and TV. Ignorance, once lost, can never be restored and needs to be protected. Not to mention the lost sales of all the violent movies, TV shows, video games, etc!

 

10.) Guns reduce people's reliance on the Police and Government. This fosters a mistaken belief in "rights". No person has the right to question authority. No person should be less than 100% dependent on authority. This is fundamental to social order. Banning guns will help to establish the Order the authorities want. This is good.

 

Gun Control - Simple Solutions for Simple Minds"

[VaiFanatic90 360]

It's safe to say he's not being serious. He's using this to take a stab at the government and local authorities by showing that those statements are in fact not true at all. Thirty minutes for the police to show up to the scene of a robbery hardly calls for people to place 100% of their trust in them, and I think that's what he's trying to say. If however, I'm reading this wrong and this guy is serious, then may God help him open his eyes to the realities around him. Again, Kudos to this guy for calling it like it is, he knows full well that police paperwork won't protect a woman from being mugged and raped. It's the simple minded people who believe that all crime will go away when there are no guns, and that the LEOs will be there to stop the crime before it happens, sorta like The Minority Report.

[Paulyski 2,227]

It's safe to say he's not being serious. He's using this to take a stab at the government and local authorities by showing that those statements are in fact not true at all. Thirty minutes for the police to show up to the scene of a robbery hardly calls for people to place 100% of their trust in them, and I think that's what he's trying to say. If however, I'm reading this wrong and this guy is serious, then may God help him open his eyes to the realities around him. Again, Kudos to this guy for calling it like it is, he knows full well that police paperwork won't protect a woman from being mugged and raped. It's the simple minded people who believe that all crime will go away when there are no guns, and that the LEOs will be there to stop the crime before it happens, sorta like The Minority Report.

With all due respect, I hope you didn't have to contemplate too long on whether he was serious or not.

 

 

"Ten Good Reasons To Ban Guns, A Satire by Bruce Gold

 

...................Gun Control - Simple Solutions for Simple Minds"

[VaiFanatic90 360]

It's safe to say he's not being serious. He's using this to take a stab at the government and local authorities by showing that those statements are in fact not true at all. Thirty minutes for the police to show up to the scene of a robbery hardly calls for people to place 100% of their trust in them, and I think that's what he's trying to say. If however, I'm reading this wrong and this guy is serious, then may God help him open his eyes to the realities around him. Again, Kudos to this guy for calling it like it is, he knows full well that police paperwork won't protect a woman from being mugged and raped. It's the simple minded people who believe that all crime will go away when there are no guns, and that the LEOs will be there to stop the crime before it happens, sorta like The Minority Report.

With all due respect, I hope you didn't have to contemplate too long on whether he was serious or not.

 

 

"Ten Good Reasons To Ban Guns, A Satire by Bruce Gold

 

...................Gun Control - Simple Solutions for Simple Minds"

 

After the first two reasons I knew he was joking, but just to be on the safe side, he could have been a simple-minded bastard who doesn't know better. And yes, I know what a Satire is.

Edited July 17, 2010 by VaiFanatic90