tover26 18 Posted September 30, 2009 Report Share Posted September 30, 2009 AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend,threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually mess in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?! I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-foot since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother, or"Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station,on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink"pimp- mobile" that was parked at the curb... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car. Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Alex P.S. Remember this motto... An armed society makes for a more civil society! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lone Star Arms 2,047 Posted September 30, 2009 Report Share Posted September 30, 2009 AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend,threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually mess in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?! I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-foot since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother, or"Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station,on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink"pimp- mobile" that was parked at the curb... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car. Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Alex P.S. Remember this motto... An armed society makes for a more civil society! I love it! BTW, we have had a right to carry law in effect in New Mexico for a number of years now. The only incident where a licensed CCW gun owner has pulled his weapon was at a Wal Mart, where a deli workers ex husband was in the process of stabbing her to death. She survived. The ex husband (who was on the receiving end of a classic Mozambique) did not. WS Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nalioth 405 Posted September 30, 2009 Report Share Posted September 30, 2009 Why are these so amusing? At least change the city/state/gun before you repost, okay? Craigslist Ad - Saiga-12.com Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Paulyski 2,227 Posted September 30, 2009 Report Share Posted September 30, 2009 Yeah, Funny shit... I got the e-mail a bit ago, looks like it is circulating well. I Posted it in the Funny Stuff section about 3 or 4 weeks ago... At that time someone told me it was already posted... It is still funny though. It reminds me of this... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLrCbrl4tjs Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tover26 18 Posted October 1, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 Didn't realize it was a repost Nailoth. A friend in the military sent it to me... my search fu isn't up to find this in the forum. Apologies. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
camon 233 Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 @Paul: That video cracks me up every time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DogMan 2,343 Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 The "Hicks vs Yuppies" video is funny.......But you do know that its all staged, right? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
camon 233 Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 ^^ Doesn't change the fact that it's hilarious. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tover26 18 Posted October 1, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 Oh my god, that video was making me nervous!!! Up until the last part... Holy crap, I'd be scared to have those jerks following me! Hmmm... I need a gun in my car now! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ryann 8 Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 Dangit! See what happens when My husband stays signed in, LOL! He wouldn't have seen nervous... that quote was all me! Oh my god, that video was making me nervous!!! Up until the last part... Holy crap, I'd be scared to have those jerks following me! Hmmm... I need a gun in my car now! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
camon 233 Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 ^^ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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